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| some dreams leave on in time; forever |
| 07.25.05 (4:58 am) [edit] |
something, i cant place what; put me off this space fer a long while. i would say i was busy, cos i was. but that cannot explain the void since ive well blogged fiercely before even in times of hustle & bustle. yeah maybe i was just afraid to spell out perils, pen down wrongs. reading yer own blackhole can be quite stifling, very unhealthy & unadvisable fer the one in self denial.
fer once, in long, i tasted the soreness of crumbling defeat, the crime of disappointment. i let go, i lost grip, & dropped onto earth, bones smarting with a twisted nightmare. throbbing, half lying, i must have shocked myself into total release. & i still share this bitter aftertaste, this burning discomfiture only eleven others can reckon with. we learn, they say; its over & a past, they reassure. thank you, we know encouragement is meant, really we are thankful. just know thanking is courtesy, & competition is unkind.
to the twelve of us who understand what it was like, how it has been, but remain shaken by the why, why it had turned out this way, dont forget but remember. dont let go but hold on. dont shirk but embrace, grow, as we all know, truly, what mattered, matters & will matter. no one will be sorry, & no one will look back. why, it sounds familiar so let me use it. dont cry because its over, smile because it happened.
even the stars refuse to shine/out of the doubt that fills my mind.
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| & even paris & rome |
| 07.10.05 (7:28 pm) [edit] |
its quite an experience to sit next to the worlds biggest moron. try it some day. (:
j did
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| & now you're swimming for the shore |
| 07.09.05 (11:24 pm) [edit] |
now im back in a flash
feeling so blessed,
back in your corner suga,
suga don't stress.
why, this place hasnt changed much has it. i guess virtual spaces dont. my my, where did time go, i think it sneaked away, & took me with it. so i lost myself in a ride, & now im pretty much back, pretty much.
its nearing season, & theres nothing but grit, & a lil bit more brutality in it. cos till theres nothing left, the contention will continue, its time to let the dormant flare. cos you cant deny something so strong.
have i mentioned, july is a month of grief, or okay, fer fear of being pummelled by j i shall be specific. the first 29 days of the month are days of grief. okay even that isnt specific. maybe its only the first week of the month, that has had so many 'vents of upsetting & gruelling moments. around me, around, things have looked tense. g recommended a camera hat that could capture the surroundings 360 degrees all the time. invented by the japanese, i think i might just need it, if it came without a blinding flash, & looked stylish enough.
the japanese invent things that make the dorkiest look even dorkier, or rather, daftly contented. 3,2,1 (:
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